I'd Lie
by Tricia Belle
Summary: "Well, there is one thing I want to talk to you about," I bite my lip, still looking into his eyes. "Remember when I told you it was all for the Games?" He nods, but he doesn't want to remember. I look down, finally breaking the connection between our eyes. I take a deep breath before I continue, "I lied." Oneshot.


****Hi readers! I've been working on this oneshot for quite some time now, and I actually forgot about it until I cleaned through my files and found this. So I finished writing it and now it's here! This is only my second time writing in present tense (the first time was for school), so if I accidentally go into past tense where I'm not supposed to, then I apologize. I'm not that content with the ending, but hopefully it's good enough. Other than that, enjoy! Don't forget to leave a review when you're finished, I'd really love your feedback!

**I'd Lie**

It has only been a few months since me and Peeta won the 74th annual Hunger Games. We only won because the Gamemakers would rather there be two victors instead of one. All of Panem believes that the only reason why me and Peeta were going to commit suicide after the rule "two victors win if they're from the same district" was revoked is because we wouldn't be able to live without one another. In other words, we would've done it out of love. Peeta had admitted that he is in love with me since the moment he saw me back when we were little. Not feeling the same way, I had to pretend to be in love with him during the Games. But that was a total lie. Truth is, I feel the _exact_ same way about him. I just couldn't confess it to him because I'm embarrassed about it. I don't know why, but I've never felt this way about a boy before and even though he feels the same way, it's still terrifying for me. Panicked when he had asked me if I loved him back, I lied and said to him that it was all for the Games. I regretted that from the moment the smile on his face had turned into a frown, and I could feel his heart drop.

The last time I saw Peeta was this morning, now that we're neighbors, but the last time I actually talked to him was after the Games ended and when we were welcomed back in the Capitol. I'm going to have to be close to him again soon, with the Victory Tour coming up and all. But I can't face him after I'd lied to his face about my feelings. I need to make things right before the tour starts. I know it will hurt him, knowing that I don't love him the way he loves me, even though I do. But he doesn't know that. I'm new to this love thing, believe it or not. I know I'm 16, but I don't intend on marrying or having kids. Either way, I owe Peeta. We are now the political target of the Capitol, and the least I can do is finally confess that the way I acted during the Games was real. I didn't want him to die, and I know I wouldn't be able to live knowing the fact that he's gone.

He's loved me longer than I loved him. The moment I knew I was in love with him was that rainy day I was sitting against a tree near his family's bakery. He threw bread at me, knowing that my family was starving at the time. I guess that's also another reason why I owe him. But seeing him walk out of the bakery, I knew I was in love. At first I couldn't believe it. Like I said, I don't plan on getting married. I was in denial for a few weeks or so, especially when I would see him at school. I finally learned to accept it a month later, when I knew this feeling in my chest wouldn't go away. Before the reaping, I hadn't seen Peeta in a while, so when his name was called, I swallowed and waited for him to come on stage. My heart was racing but my face didn't show it. From the moment I heard his name, I knew I had to get him back to District 12 alive. I knew I would have to sacrifice my life for him, even though I promised Prim I would win. I guess it all worked out in my favor.

Knowing each day is a day closer to the Victory Tour, my heartbeat keeps beating faster. I have to tell Peeta soon. But I don't know how to tell him. _I lied about pretending to not be in love with you. Are we okay now? _I'm probably going to say something across the lines of that. I don't know who to talk about this with, so I decide to visit Haymitch and ask him. Luckily, I chose a day where he's sober. Well, he's not completely sober, but he's not completely drunk either. He's at his best right now, and that's the Haymitch I like talking to.

I walk outside in the cool air and walk until I reach Haymitch's house in the Victor's Village. The Victor's Village only consists of my family, Peeta's family, and Haymitch. It's a quiet area. I like it that way.

I knock on Haymitch's door. There's no answer. I knock again. His voice can be heard from the kitchen.

"The door's open!"

Upon hearing his voice, I open the door and proceed to the kitchen. Haymitch just finished eating his breakfast. I sit down at the kitchen table across from him.

"Haymitch," I begin, "I need your help."

Haymitch was my mentor for the Games, but ever since I moved into the Victor's Village, I became closer to him. He gives good advice. But I don't know what his reaction will be when I ask him about this love thing and Peeta.

"I'm all ears," Haymitch replied as he leans back in his chair and puts both arms behind his head.

"I've been lying this whole time about loving Peeta." I take a deep breath before saying this.

"Yeah, I know."

I shake my head in confusion.

"No, I mean I lied about not being in love with him," I correct myself.

"What do you mean?" Haymitch looks confused. I'm confused with all my thoughts as well.

"The way I acted during the Games," I look down at my lap and play with my hands. "It was all real. I lied to Peeta and told him I was just pretending."

"Now, why would you do that, sweetheart? This whole ordeal would be so much easier for the both of you."

"I don't know what I was thinking!" I place my elbows on the table and bury my face in them. I'm still so confused as to why I'd lied to Peeta in the first place. "I was embarrassed, I guess." Haymitch gives me a look to continue my thoughts. "I never intended on getting married, so liking boys has been out of my brain. Until I met Peeta, that is."

"You might think this is a bad thing, but trust me, this is the greatest thing I've ever heard since Peeta told me he's in love with you." Haymitch adjusts his position in his chair. "Peeta and you, you guys won't be a target anymore. You both love each other, and it's obvious now that the thing with the berries was really an act of love."

I didn't think of that until Haymitch said it. But he's right. We won't be a target. We won't be known as the kids who started an uprising in the districts. We weren't rebelling. We're just two kids in love. What's the harm in that? Telling Peeta the truth is becoming more and more of a good idea by the second.

"I suggest you tell him now," Haymitch says, standing up and stretching. "I have to go meet up with Cinna and Effie to plan the Victory Tour anyway."

I didn't say anything. I'm in deep thought, carefully stringing together words that I can to possibly build up the courage to say to Peeta.

I stand up, and Haymitch leads me out of his house. He walks me to Peeta's house before he goes off to the Justice Building. I swallow my pride and make a fist with my hand to knock on the door. I hear footsteps, and I hope it is Peeta's. The door opens, and just as I expected, it's the boy with the bread. He gestures me to come in, and he leads me up to his room. His whole family's already at the bakery, while I suspect he volunteered to clean the house today. Even though it's only me and him at his house at the moment, he knows I'd rather be in his room.

I sit on his bed and I wait for him to sit beside me.

"What brings you here, Miss Everdeen?" Peeta flashes a smile. The smile that makes me melt… I don't feel any awkwardness at the moment. I braced myself for a bit of awkwardness just because we haven't had a conversation in forever. But I'm glad he's acting like this because it shows that even if we've been apart, nothing's changing between us.

"Just thought I should visit you," I return his smile. But my smile is a more nervous one. I hope he doesn't notice. "But I'm not sure if this is the right time right now. I can see you're busy with cleaning the house."

"No, no, it's okay," He places his hand over mine, as if he knows I'm about to get up and leave. "I actually just finished, so you arrived at the perfect time."

He's being way too nice to me, even though he believes I don't love him. This boy's strong.

"So what do you want to talk about?" I look around the room, avoiding his gaze.

"Beats me, you're the one who came to visit me," Peeta reminds me, trying ever so desperately to catch my eyes. Lucky for him, I give up and end up looking straight into his eyes.

"Well, there _is_ one thing I want to talk to you about," I bite my lip, still looking into his eyes. "Remember when I told you it was all for the Games?" He nods, but he doesn't want to remember. I look down, finally breaking the connection between our eyes. I take a deep breath before I continue, "I lied."

Peeta begins to stare into space. His face full of awe. He's speechless. He doesn't know how to respond. The room is full of silence for the next few minutes. My heart begins to race, dreading his answer.

"But," Peeta looks baffled, "why would you lie to me?"

I place my face in my hands. I can't say anything either. When I finally build up the courage to answer him, I respond with, "I didn't want anyone to get hurt."

"I think it would've been safer if you told me the truth in the first place," He admits. "I mean, now we won't be the Capitol target."

"That's exactly what Haymitch said," I tell him. "So, what are we then?"

"I don't know, what do you want us to be?" He stares dead into my eyes.

"Let's just take it slow, I mean, we have the Victory Tour ahead of us." For once, after the Games, my life finally feels somewhat right.


End file.
